For those of you who haven’t seen The Princess Bride, do so. You will not regret it. For those of you who have, you’re going to recognize the allusion. Prince Humperdinck’s bishop was played by Peter Cook, and his speech still sends people into gales of laughter when they watch the show. Here’s the relevant point to today’s Brown post.:
“Mawwiage. Mawwiage is what bwings us togevah today. Mawwiage…that dweam wivvin a dweam, that bwessed union…etc.”
I thought I’d start off on a little bit of a tongue in cheek note, because the first suggestion for success is a pretty heavy subject to get into, and some of the stuff I’m going to say is pretty controversial. It states, once again:
1. Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery.
It’s a true thing. It really is. I have seen marriages both successful and unsuccessful, and those who are really right for each other make it plain by their actions, by their character as others see it, and by what they highlight about each other to each other. Let me take you through some passages just to get some ground under us:
Genesis 2:18-25
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” So out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”
So two things become clear here. First, that it is not good for man to be alone…marriage is an essential part of life. Second, that a man will leave his family to start a new one, and in doing so he is to hold fast to his wife. That is, he is to consider her worthy of any sacrifice necessary for the preservation of the marriage.
This understanding of marriage is expanded upon in the Song of Songs or Song of Solomon. In 2:7, 3:5 and 8:4, that book declares this thing:
“I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.”
The whole book is an illumination of the point and privilege of marriage. In 3:11, this is written: “Go out, O daughters of Zion, and look upon King Solomon, with the crown with which his mother crowned him on the day of his wedding, on the day of the gladness of his heart.” In 5:16b, this is written: “This is my beloved and this is my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem.” There’s more, but my time is limited in this one. Suffice it to say with regards to the aims of marriage in Song of Solomon that marriage is meant to bring delight to the bride and the bridegroom both, delight such that anything else is incomparable, that each is to be lost without the other.
What becomes clear throughout the Old Testament (and there are hundreds of illustrations regarding marriage and family) is that marriage is meant to be a source of joy and hope, not misery and despair to those privileged enough to be married. The New Testament gives illustrations of marriage in a much deeper way, likening the union of man and wife to be the closest earthly reflection of the fellowship of God to reconciled man, to pre-sinful or post-redeemed man.
Just as an aside, two of the essential reasons, I believe, why Jesus never married is to preserve Himself as the righteous Bridegroom but also to indicate that His fellowship with the Lord did not need to be reflected or found in marriage, but that His relationship with his Father was complete without it. This would be a very different can of worms, and you may see a meditation on it at some point later on.
The matters of Christ as Bridegroom are a related topic, but I can’t get into it here because it would take you far too long to read the post. There are also some gaping holes to fill, because to articulate a theology of marriage would be almost an academic paper in length. I’ll return to this topic when I get to suggestion 21, but for now, here’s the next one. You’ll see this in a few days.
2. Work at something you enjoy and that’s worthy of your time and talent.
Blessings;
Christ-bearer.
